I am overwhelmed with the generosity of those who support me for my upcoming 1/2 Ironman. Holy cow. I went running today and it was different. Without the risk of sounding cheesy, it was really like everyone who donated was saying “Go. do it for your dad. we are ALL so proud of you”. It’s like you know how much I want him to be here right now. It’s like you get it. You are effected. And, clearly, it is contagious. So, thank you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.
It is clear from Caring Bridge during my father’s hospital stay how many people truly loved him. I am pretty sure he knew that. He loved people. He loved his friends. He loved a lot. Which leads me to his “everyday quote” — LOVE AND LIVE WITH NO REGRETS.
Let’s break it down.
LOVE WITH NO REGRETS. Do you? Do you really take the time to honor those important to you? Do you tell them how you feel, better yet, SHOW THEM how you feel? I knew everyday how much my father loved me. Even if he didn’t say it, it was in his smile. His voice. His actions. I am not saying go home and have a love fest with your family (although you should give it some serious thought!). I am not that naive. For some people, this is very difficult. So – combine it with our family’s other (recent) motto — “One Day at a Time”. Here is a suggestion – take baby steps. If someone does something you particular enjoyed, then tell them. If you feel good and happy when you are around them, then let them know. It can be anything. Just do it without regret.
LIVE WITH NO REGRETS. Do you? Do you ever say “I will get to it later?”. Do you live in a constant state of procrastination? Start living. Mix it up a little and have pancakes for dinner. Eat in the bathtub. Accomplish a goal you have had your heart set on for a long time. Laugh. Enjoy traffic. Do something you are passionate about that you don’t take the time to do. My dad lived each day to the fullest. He had a bucket list to finish no doubt about it, but he also had on this bucket list hundreds of things already accomplished. Check! He was amazing. And me? I spoke about starting this fitness / coaching company for years. It was my dad’s support and motivation that put it to fruition. I created the company because I was surrounded by people saying “I wish I could run _ (fill in blank) amount of miles”, or “I want to do a triathlon”, or “I have always wanted to learn how to swim”. They dreamed about this stuff for years, but no real action was taken. Whatever it is, take that time today. Make it happen – for nothing else – but for yourself.
I found myself today being very overwhelmed. Am I being the best mom? Can I write more, learn more, read more? If I miss being a chaperone at my son’s event will I regret it? Do I spend time cooking a nice meal for the family or organizing the house? When can I do laundry? How in the world will I get it all done? Normal feelings most people have (to some extent we probably all feel overwhelmed here and then – right??) but now it seems different. Like I am really trying to prove something. To outdo myself. To be the best. To make him proud. Prouder? Oh, I don’t know. I just miss my dad.